I know that as adults we are supposed to be in charge, have all the answers and definitely know better than children, right?
However I think we are mistaken to think that children have nothing to teach us. If we stop, watch and listen maybe we can find a way back to what we already know.
How to Stay in the Present Moment
Children live in the present moment, they do not know past and future. I’m no child psychologist but I am a mother, grandmother, aunt and once was a teacher. As such I’ve watched many children growing up, they live in the now and they want what they want, now.
The problem is that we teach them that this is wrong, we instill fear for the future if they don’t behave in a certain way. It’s a sad day when you see a child lose that innocence and begin to contemplate what lies ahead, not with curiosity but with fear of failure.
Perhaps it’s time we looked at our children with an open mind, let them live without our fears and learn from them. After all they are correct, there is no other time than the present moment. The past and the future are just thinking, not real.
How to Make Friends and How to be a Friend
How many times do we hear children say “I don’t want to be her/his friends anymore, I don’t like them anymore”?
How many times do we watch children fight or argue and step in to tell them how to make up?
Of course as adults we can share our experience with a child who is having a problem with a friend. But why do we insist on telling children to cling on to friendships that may no longer serve them?
We find it uncomfortable to say the truth to others because it might hurt them. Children on the other hand lack diplomacy and usually just say it as it is. Who’s got it right here? I think perhaps it’s better to be honest with others, in the long run it’s far healthier.
What about arguments? We should never condone violence, it is our duty to teach children how to settle any argument in a peaceful way. But there is nothing wrong with children arguing, it’s life. Adults argue all the time, worse adults create wars and violence in the world. Perhaps we should be teaching our children how to have a good argument, without feeling bad about it and without the need to get angry, resentful and violent.
How to Love – Children Know What Adults Have Forgotten.
Watch a child in the presence of someone they feel safe with, someone that gives them love and attention. It’s the greatest lesson in love that we as adults will ever learn.
They trust, they give everything in return and they give love unconditionally. All they want is to feel safe and loved in return. They don’t judge you, they don’t look at your appearance, they just love you for who you are.
Children don’t try to change you, they are totally accepting and loving. Adults tend to go into a relationship then spend the rest of their lives trying to change their partner. Strange way to behave I’d say, don’t get me wrong I’ve been there and know it’s not healthy. Surely if your partner needs changing then they are not for you or you need to change your expectations.
So let’s watch our children more, let’s learn from them and maybe we can get back to loving life a bit more.