One Day You Wake Up and Realize You Have Lost Yourself

A man writes a letter after finding out that his wife was having an affair for over ten years. He shows no anger but realises how much of his life he has wasted and how much of his real self he has lost over the years.

He writes: 

“I have been living my whole life the opposite of how I wanted. All my dreams, my passion, gone. In a steady 9-7 job, 6 days a week – for 26 years I repeatedly chose the safe path for everything, which eventually changed who I was”

I particularly love it when he writes:

“If my younger self had met me today, I would have punched myself in the face.”

He goes on to describe what he was like in his 20’s, the dreams he had of writing a book, traveling and helping the poor. Then he did what most of us do, took the safe route, took the acceptable route, the one that is drummed into us from young, get married, have children, buy a house and get a mortgage. Now work for ever to pay that off and forget about all those childish dreams of yours.

This man asks some deeply emotional questions of himself

“What happened to me?”

“What do I even want now?”

His story touched me because it resonates with me and I think probably with most of you reading it.

I remember when my marriage ended, the first few months I really didn’t know who I was, didn’t even know what music I liked to listen to. I have to say I threw a few CD’s out of my car window because I didn’t have to listen to them anymore! I mean really how do we convince ourselves it’s OK to like something we don’t really like for the sake of “fitting in” with society or with someone else?

How can we spend so much of our lives sleeping?

And worse why do we have to wait until such dramatic events happen to us to wake up?

What this story does show me is that I should be very thankful for the new freedom I have, the chance to start again and find myself again. This time though, I will close my ears so I can’t hear the doubters, the scaremongers and just follow my own path. It’s never too late to change your path!