If you watch a child go about it’s business you are reminded of life’s most important lesson. A child wants to experience, it does not have any prejudgments about something being good or bad. The child wants to find out, touch it, taste it, smell it and then he or she will know. Until of course we come along as adults and instill fear, judgement and control.
We live our lives under an illusion that somehow we can control things. Deep down we know that’s not true, over and over we are shown through experience that we have absolutely no control.
What would happen if we let go of controlling everything?
I do my best not to pre-judge people and experiences, I have an open mind to most things with a curiosity to find out for myself. That can at times lead to a “bad experience” where the outcome may not be what I would have liked it to be.
Does this make it a mistake?
Some may say it is wrong to think like a child because we are adults, we should know better.
I’ll be bold and argue that even as adults we don’t have the answers to everything, if anything. Just because something was a certain way before doesn’t make it so now.
“I know one thing; that I know nothing” – Socrates
What happens when you think you have the answers? When you have decided about someone or something before you give it a chance?
Simple you “stop playing” with life. That’s the sad part of trying to control everything, life loses it’s zest and you lose your excitement for life.
I don’t advocate being irresponsible and not using some common sense but to completely live within the confines of your own pre-judgments is limiting.
It’s difficult to change the way we think because it’s a preconditioned state, slowly over time we are made to think we have some kind of control in our lives. What would happen if you changed your way of thinking and every morning you got up with this one question
“I wonder what will happen today?”
Maybe you will have some unsavoury experiences, get into some sticky situations and perhaps even get hurt.Oh wait, that happens anyway, whether you try to control your life or not. So why bother?
Limiting beliefs such as “I won’t talk to that person because I know that type?” What type is that then? How sure are you that your prejudgment hasn’t just stopped you from meeting an amazing person who may bring something unexpected into your life? Is someone judging you similarly?
What happens if you live life with open curiosity, just like a child? You may fall and you may get hurt. And just like a child you will learn, you will learn about yourself and you will grow from that.
A child will never learn to walk if he or she doesn’t fall at least once. We will never fulfill our full potential if we live life under the false pretense that we have any control over what may happen in the next minute.
Accepting this and living with an open curiosity and with little control can be freeing. What other choice is there?
In giving away the control, you’ve got it – Alan Watts
This short video by Alan Watts describes the essence of living life without trying to control everything, after all nothing is really in our control in any case.