Christmas is just around the corner, ready to spring on us with all it that it brings with it. Of course it’s a special time for many of us. We have time to spend with our friends and family. Nothing more rewarding than spending quality time with loved one’s.
Christmas can also be a stressful time. There’s the run up to Christmas, the presents, the shopping, the crowded shops and all the preparation for the special day. For some it can cause money worries, how to afford to buy the presents, to host the dinner and all the extra expense.
All of this can make us irritable and emotional. Throw in a difficult person and tensions can get high. We all have one or two of these people in our lives. In normal situations we deal with them in a healthy way, sometimes we may just choose to ignore their behaviour but when we are feeling stressed, it’s not always possible to be as calm.
Before I continue, let me just remind you that if you do react out of character be kind to yourself, don’t beat yourself up and just let it be.
Catch Our Emotions Before They Catch Us
I guess the most important thing we can do is to catch our emotions before they catch us. As a Mindfulness Practitioner this is where being totally aware of your own thoughts, feelings and emotions comes in. With all the fussing, noise and running around we can lose sight of what is going on in our own minds, then we let our emotions run the show.
If you feel that you are getting lost in your emotions perhaps you could find a space to practice the 3 step breathing space. Or simply take yourself away from the situation for a few minutes, breathe and take stock of your own mind.
In reality people only appear difficult to us because they don’t meet our expectations. We expect them to act in a certain way, to say things we would like them to say and when they don’t we are let down. But how realistic are these expectations?
Perhaps we should realign our expectations. It would be even better to try to completely remove any expectations we have of others. Sounds impossible? Maybe it is, but the less we expect from others the more chance we have of not being let down.
Being Aware of Our Ego
And here is the big one, our ego. We need to be right, recognised or listened to. Whatever it is that is eating at us is often what causes us to react in certain ways towards others.
That doesn’t mean that other people are not difficult or challenging. What it does mean is that we can only be in charge of our own reaction to others, we can not control their behaviour only our own.
We can let anger take over and create negative energy, causing the situation to be worse. Or we can try to show compassion towards the other person, try to see what is causing them to act in that way. This creates a much more positive energy for everyone.