feeling not good enough

Isn’t it strange that however much you work on yourself, somehow you never quite feel good enough?

The self development, self improvement industry has a lot to answer for. Everywhere you look people are selling you things to make you feel better, everywhere you look you are being told there is a better you out there, if only you would lose weight, put on some make up, dress up like the latest pop idol.

But wait a minute, does that mean you are not good enough now? Does that mean that you have to wait until you achieve all these ideal states before you can be truly happy? I say drop all that and start to just be who you are, with pride!

It is time for us to stop beating ourselves up for the sake of some make believe better person we will become. Every minute we waste on trying to achieve this future perfect person or state we miss the beauty that is now.

Perhaps if we keep the following in our minds as we go about our day, then we can start to feel better about ourselves:

  • Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. You are you, full stop. Honor your individuality in whatever form it comes. After all that is all you have.
  • Start to see the good things in you, the unique things you have that only you know about. And if you don’t know yourself well enough then get learning.
  • Let go of trying to control your future, live in the now and start to accept that now is the only moment that is worth focusing on.
  • Practice self compassion all the time. You can not be kind to others if you can’t be kind to yourself.
  • Practice self acceptance because you are who you are for a reason. Accept it and explore it, you never know what you might discover.
  • Give yourself a break. I bet you would never treat another the way you treat yourself? Get off your own case for a while and see what happens.
  • Have no expectations of others, that way you will feel less disappointment. Often that feeling of not being good enough is a reflection of the disappointment we feel towards others.
  • If someone treats you bad it causes you pain, of course that’s normal. But remember pain is part of life, suffering however is an option. People’s behavior is a reflection of their own insecurities, don’t let them play on you, let them go.

I know it’s easier said than done. But you can make an effort to change your thoughts to help you start feeling better about yourself today, one step at a time.