“sometimes when things are falling apart, they may actually be falling into place” – Pema Chodron
My Journey to Freedom in Later Life
I started Freedom in Later Life to journal the unexpected new path my life had taken at the age of 50. I guess I was looking for a way to get things out of my head and share my story with anyone who might be going through something similar.
I’ll briefly explain what started this new journey. In 2013 my life took an unexpected turn, first I was made redundant from my high paying job as an education adviser then shortly after my thirty year marriage came to an end. I was in my early fifties, having worked hard all my life and focused on bringing up my three children, I had imagined this time to now be my time to take things easy.
But life has a way of throwing it’s little surprises at you and the story of the “happy ever after” turned out to be false. So instead of taking things easy, I had to start all over, this time finding myself single again after being married since my early twenties.
The first big shock for me was being made redundant, even though I had suffered considerable poor treatment at the job I was in, I didn’t expect to be made redundant. And as the main earner in the house, it was a scary time.
Not long after the cracks in my marriage started to show, even though over the years we had occasions when things were rough, this time it was different. This time I was less able to tolerate the betrayal, the lies and the disrespect. I think it was because my children had grown up, they were all working and I felt it was time to finally wake up and live my life.
That doesn’t mean I was in an awful marriage, there was no physical abuse or even any real arguments. But it was flat, it was lifeless and it was dragging me down. I guess once my ex-husband started to give me enough excuses to say “enough is enough” I felt strong enough to end it.
It was not an easy time, it was extremely difficult to let go of thirty years, let go of my family unit, my home and even my role as a wife. Of course had I not mistakenly received a text message from my husband arranging to meet up with another lady, perhaps I would have put up with this less of a life until the end. So I’m thankful for that text message, well I am now, wasn’t the case then.
And this is it I am truly grateful even for that painful time because it has released me and allowed me to create a life I love. Now I am free to choose to live how I wish, I am the master of my life. This new freedom is precious to me, I value it ever minute of the day.
You can read what I’ve done since my divorce here. My journey continues, as does it for all of us. We are creatures that are meant to evolve, life is not static.